Tuesday, 26 October 2021

Brian & Leigh, October 2021

It's been almost a year since my last update. And since then, whew!

Externally
The dome greenhouse is up but not planted yet. The solar panels and batteries are in and work great. We got an electric car to go with all that solar and love it. Heat pumps are next. I've done tons of tweaking of the interiors, so the living areas are more finished now. I'll add more windows to the guest house. I'll install cabinets for the apartment kitchen soon, so that's closer to being finished. Now I've got a real shop, yeah! Leigh has brought in lots of cool art to make things our own. There is still plenty to do, and things are shaping up.

Leigh met a scholar attending Elsewhere. She stayed in the guest house over the summer and she and her friends have been a delight to have here.

In August I had Coddiwomple trucked from Virginia to Anacortes, Washington. We spent a few months exploring the San Juan Islands. I drove a reconnaissance loop around British Columbia ahead of my plan to experience Desolation Sound (and maybe beyond!) next summer.

I had a wonderful visit with nieces, nephews and their kids in Santa Cruz. And mother who is turning 100! I set mom up with Zoom so we can connect with her much more easily.

Leigh got her license activated for Colorado and will be seeing patients in town soon. The Doctor will be right with you, yeah!

And now we're back in Colorado with some white already on the local mountains. The deer are coming down in anticipation of winter. We're looking forward to snow sports and the hot springs. And of course all the projects.

Internally
Things are definitely moving profoundly and rapidly. I'll start with Leigh.

Leigh was nearly blind. Imagine finding your way by feel, contact lenses, and not being able to see who or what is there. Imagine living in a constant state of stress and fear. Lasik changed all that a few years ago, literally overnight. She now has 20/20 vision and her life is completely different. A similar thing happened when we attended a course in Sun Valley, ID in October. As she says in that video link “...you will dissolve your anxieties, your conflicts, your unhealed wounds, and you come upon freedom.” That's exactly what happened. Leigh getting her license (in three days!) and practicing again are external evidence of this huge internal dissolution. I'm so happy!

I am shifting also. Over the past year I have become calmer and more aware. I sometimes see this 'thing' operating, run by it's programs. There's a new kind of peace, and a different silence, and a compassion that is settling into me.

For the many years that I did so much 'personal work', I always yearned to help people. But I knew I wasn't ready: my agenda and ego were too active to honestly sit with anyone. About 10 years ago that shifted and I was in a place where helping could happen, and it did. I made a difference in a lot of lives.

I was in India many year ago visiting Bhagavan's old school. I wandered around and came upon a groundskeeper. I doubt he spoke English. I remember it as vividly as if was now: he turned and our eyes met. I saw that he saw all of me, through me, and beyond me. Energy, depth, compassion and light was coming through him. It shot through my body and penetrated physically into my skull. A universe, a realm, of loving light expanded into me. In that instant I knew that the life, the reality that I live in, is a tiny fraction of what is there. I saw what I am seeking. We didn't speak. He walked away and my life was changed.  He lives in the state that Preethaji describes.  

So that's what I want: to affect people like that groundskeeper did me. And thanks to the countless blessings and ceaseless work of Sri AmmaBhagavan, it is gradually happening. I feel myself filling, being replaced, with space, and light. It's a beautiful thing.